Lady Gaga

Lady Gaga’s second coming First the Celine bag. Then A Star Is Born. We smell an Oscar. Or a fashion award.

Hoarding See Gucci’s AW18 adverts shot by Glen Luchford, featuring shelves overflowing with china figurines, wigs and ceramics.

Fireside Dogs
 Ornaments: on the up. Photograph: Alamy

Polo-neck hair Tucking your hair into a polo neck – so practical, so sassy – is back, as seen in the new John Lewis adverts. ’Tis the season…

Millets With hiking boots and fleeces the height of fashion, the outdoor store is a one-stop shop this season. Walking holidays are not compulsory.

Marc Jacobs show, Spring/Summer 2019, New York fashion week
 Marc Jacobs’ New York show. Photograph: Rex/Shutterstock

Social x-ray dressing Marc Jacobs’ collection is straight out of Tom Wolfe’s The Bonfire Of The Vanities. Late 80s Manhattan socialites are go.

Eurythmics Love Is A Stranger on the soundtrack at Ferragamo, Sexcrime at Chalayan. Sweet dreams for the new season.

The Mango pink cord trouser suit Every front row of London fashion week can’t be wrong.

Travel pillows Those brightly coloured squishy neck pillows are the inspiration behind one of the Prada bags. Who said fashion had no sense of humour.

Going down

‘Pumpkin spice Now a seasonal put-down, meaning basic. Ouch.

Massive straw hats Instead, search for a massive straw bag, à la Jacquemus’s recent catwalk show. You heard it here first.

woman in a straw hat
 Off with that straw hat. Photograph: Getty Images

Choosing a winter coat Balenciaga says just wear all your coats at the same time. We recommend two for autumn and three for winter.

 Farewell, old fruit. Photograph: Getty Images

Pineapples For autumn/winter Prada went for banana prints, for spring/summer Gucci went for strawberries; refresh your fruit salad accordingly.

Flannels Air drying your face is, apparently, the more hygienic, more cost-effective (less washing) and à la mode way of drying.

Buffets Fashion-approved chef Lei Saito prefers to make “existential food sculptures” (think cheese landscapes). Probably not available for birthdays, weddings and barmitzvahs.

Chipboard As used all over the Goop pop-up shop in London (shelves, walls, you name it). Over it.

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